Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Bad News Bears

Today I went back to see my doctor since I've had NO results from physical therapy. My doctor apparently now thinks I have bulging/herniated discs at L3, and L5/S1, so he referred me for an MRI and an EMG. What I want to know is, why didn't he tell me this 6 weeks ago and send me for an MRI then instead of sending me to weeks of PT that he knew wasn't going to work? I still have to wait for my insurance company to approve the MRI, so I don't have an appointment yet. I'm anxious to see what's going on in there.

Last night's leg workout was AWFUL! Worst I've had in a while. The pain and numbness in my left leg was unbearable. I couldn't handle any weight, and I literally did most of the workout in tears (I'm totally the biggest crybaby ever). Started with 4x20 extensions to pre-exhaust my quads, then went over to leg press where we did 3 increasing sets of 10-8-6 followed by a high rep set of 30. Then we moved on to hack squats where my intention was to do 2 sets of 10 one and a half reps. I crumpled under the sled after 7 reps on the first set. Pulled off 10 pounds for the second set and only got 6. Being the stubborn biatch that I am, I decided to try the same weight again and only got 5. Next we super-setted walking DB lunges with 1-leg extensions for 4 sets. By this time, I had no feeling in anything on my lower left half and had no pump in my left quad. For the first time ever, I think I experienced what it's like to expend more energy fighting my body than actually fighting the weight. I miss the days when I used to get leg-day anxiety because I knew it would be a killer workout. Now I get leg-day anxiety because I dread the pain/numbness. Plus I also get back-day anxiety now because I can't dead lift without being in pain. It's just so frustrating.

This morning I trained hams with little difference in physical or mental state from last night and then finished with 35 minutes of cardio. I'll do the remaining 55 minutes tonight after work. Tonight and tomorrow will be a welcome mental break from training.

On a bit of a more positive note, I weighed myself this morning. Unfortunately it was after the morning's workout and after I'd drank a ton of water, so it's not what I would consider an acurate weight (since I always check first thing on a completely empty stomach). I was 143.4, which means the weight is going in the right direction now. I think I should be at 140 by Saturday. I'm really hoping to see 139, but I don't think that's realistic. My upper body continues to get harder, but, as usual, my lower body remains fat. I know it's going to be a brutal diet for me in order to get my glutes to come in, but I don't care. I want it so bad. One good thing I know about myself is that once I'm locked in, it's like a switch flips and it's virtually impossible to derail me. Guess that's good and bad.

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