Much Needed Mental Break

Last night was one of my good friend's weddings, marking the official end to my wedding season this year and reminding me that my offseason is coming to a close. With that in mind, I decided to let loose a little bit. After weighing myself yesterday morning and seeing that I stayed at 141.2 even with the added carbs and cutting back on cardio, I decided to eat a little extra and have a few glasses of wine last night at the wedding. Of course, by eating a little extra I mean I had some of the mashed potatoes that came with my filet and took a couple bites of the wedding cake. In light of more relationship drama in my life lately, I have obviously been feeling pretty blah about everything. So last night was great to just hang out, drink, and dance with some really good friends. In fact, my friends were so surprised that I was drinking that they felt that meant I needed to have a(well, ok, several) full glasses of wine in front of me at all times. But I was good and didn't overindulge....can't say that for some of the other people there though. A bunch of us, including the bride and groom, went out for a bit after the reception ended, and I was quickly reminded why I don't go out to bars....drunk douchebags, 'nuff said.

Now, when I woke up this morning, you would think I'd drank a gallon of wine and been out until 5am....my feet hurt, sore throat, achy, tired, and a headache. WTF. I'm getting old. Anyway, it made for a not so great shoulder workout. But my chest was still sore from Friday, and my back was hammered from yesterday's workout. I have no idea what I did different but whatever it was, I was feeling it. This upcoming week, I'm cutting my cardio back from 45 minutes 5 days to 30 minutes 5 days. We're going to let my weight creep back up a bit. I still don't have an exact date for when the diet will start, but I have a distinct feeling that it will be July 11 instead of the 25th....god I hate being fat. Either way, it's quickly approaching, and not until I started writing this, did I begin to get nervous. I've had such a long offseason, and I've gotten used to eating a lot...what if I can't hack it on the diet this year? What if I can't make it to the end? What if I look like shit? I've been out of a dieting mindframe for so long that I wonder if it will work against me instead of allowing me to be more mentally prepared to diet. Aaaahhh yes, the fucked up mind of a bodybuilder...